There is something I am trying to say
But the words don’t come out as I want them to
I feel weak because I don’t want you to go on
Thinking that I don’t care, when in reality
I don’t stop thinking of the last time I saw your face,
The last time I heard your laugh,
And the last words you said to me
The things I want to say to you don’t come out right
I don’t want to screw this up
But it’s not like I haven’t done that yet
I’m sorry that I hurt you and I’m sorry that I left you behind
I never wanted to do any of that
And I don’t even know why I did
I guess I thought you would walk out first
And I couldn’t bear it if you left me
So rather than tell you how I felt
I did to you what I didn’t want done to me
I’m a hypocrite in my own line of reason
And for that I am sorry
I can’t take it back; there will never be a rewind button
I only hope that you give me another chance
A chance to prove myself as I have changed
Or at least I would like to think I have
I want to show you that I’m not who you knew before
I’m still me, but I care more about myself and others now
I don’t go around cursing myself anymore
And I want you to see it; I want you to stay with me again
Like you did when I was sick or scared
I want you to hold me again,
Like you did when I thought I was too far gone
I just want you to know who I am now
And I want you to be the same old person you were
Because that’s who I could fall in love with
That’s who I was happy with and who I wanted to be with
It was just you and me back then
And I’m sorry I ruined that
Please hear these words, because I feel I’ve already lost you.